Oh Lord, won’t you buy me, a Merrrcedes-Benz. My friends all drive Porshees, ah must make a-mends. Worked hard all mah lifetime, no help from my friends. So-o Lord, won’t you buy me a Merrrcedes-Benz…
Ahem, excuse me. Didn’t know you had snuck up on me so fast.
Let’s just be honest, though, for a second. If it were I who were performing the song, it would go a little something like this: Oh Lord, won’t you buy me a Porsche tur-bo-o, my friends all drive Benz’s, they all look like clones, worked hard all my lifetime, no help from my boss. So-o Lord, won’t you buy me a Porsche tur-boooo! But whatever. No one asked me.
My dad recently acquired a Mercedes-Benz. And no, it’s not what you’re thinking. AT ALL. But it kicks ass. Here’s a little preview:
This is no ordinary Benz. This is a junk-yard Benz. No really, he bought it at the junk-yard for a couple c-notes. (For my New England readers who may have lost me here: the Recyling Station.)
He refers to the Benz as “The Benz,” though he claims to have named it Lazarus. I derno… The Benz works for me. But Lazarus is his name. These are Lazarus’ guts:
That’s back in the good old days before they started covering up everybody’s engines with plastic shields to “keep it clean” (aka extended labor charges).
Since this is “notes” from my dad, afterall, I think it’s fair to quote him directly for a while: “I had the front bumper painted black, it gives the front end a stronger look, and the chrome pops better. I also painted the grill black. The bumper, hood, chrome grill driver’s fender, headlight assembly were all damaged so I made the changes as we put it back together. I also had the rocker covers painted black. It has a new windshield, I had new tie rods installed, the guys damaged it when they picked it up a year ago. It is amazing how much continuing damage a car gets after the accident.”
He continues: “I got a new radiator and AC condenser. When I say new, I really mean things I picked from other cars in the junkyard transfer station (except for the tire rods and the windshield). I pulled a couple of black hood window washer nozzles off a late model E. It came with those dish style wheels, but about 3 months ago a 560 came in with these wheels on it so I swapped those. The new ones are 7 1/2 X 15″ – MADE IN ITALY! I have two 16″s from an 03 SEL (it was burned in the front) so when I find a couple of more, and need some tires I’ll switch these wheels for those.
Lazarus' wheels and tires
“ The airbag on the pass side popped so I dug a glove box out of another 560 SEL, rather than try and replace the bag. What a job, something I’m not going to do again.
“We had a 560 that had been vandalized and it has 4 almost new (20,000 miles) Bilstein heavy duty shocks, so I pulled those and replaced the tired original Boge shocks. I rebuilt the the brakes and flushed all the fluid, and put dust free pads in it. I got a K&N air filter, new wiper blades, a new battery, put some Mobil1 in the engine, trans, and rear end. The boss wants me to take the trunk off a black 92 560. Says I shouldn’t be driving a 300SE.
“While hunting and gathering parts I pulled a substantial amount of backup parts, everything from fuel pumps to window motors. That reminds me, both back window tracks were kaput so I had to replace those, of my, what a job, almost as bad as the the glovebox… It is a 20 year-old car with 160,000 miles on it. Everything works.”
Well, now it does, since its gotten a whole lotta’ Southern Hospitality. At the risk of exposing myself as a cliche monger: this is a true “diamond in the rough” story.
The best part is that he got a real project out of it, not just a car. If there weren’t a labor intensive project involved in this vehicle, he’d probably have no interest in even owning the thing.
Who buys a Mercedes from a junkyard? And then gets it in great looking condition and actually drives it? My dad, that’s who. I guess the Lord really did give my dad a Mercedes-Benz. Whod’a thought?
If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!